'Real Madrid make me feel like I have a small penis' – Robbie Williams attempts to lure Kroos to Man Utd

Real Madrid make Robbie Williams feel “as if I had a small penis,” the singer has admitted.

Appearing in a documentary about Madrid midfielder and friend Toni Kroos, the 45-year-old singer admitted he had tried to convince the German to sign for his beloved Manchester United.

That there is a lot of love and affection between the pair is no secret to those who follow Kroos on social media, and Williams responded after his last-minute equaliser for Germany against Sweden at the 2018 World Cup.

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Now, Williams has made a considerably more unusual revelation.

“You’ve won everything in Madrid, I’m asking you to sign for Manchester United!” he says in the documentary.

“I think we have the best league in the world, the Premier League. That’s why one thing annoys me a lot.

“Real Madrid have made me feel small, as if I had a small penis. Football is my religion and I don’t like that there are gods bigger than mine.”

The former Take That member’s insecurities aside, the documentary also reveals some interesting details about Kroos’ career to date.

Now 29, he moved to Madrid after helping Germany win the 2014 World Cup in Brazil, having previously spent a successful year on loan at Bayer Leverkusen.

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According to his wife, Jessy, he wasn’t overly happy at Bayern, despite winning three Bundesliga titles and the Champions League.

“I don’t think Toni ever settled in here, right from the start,” Jessy said.

“When Toni was at Bayer Leverkusen, he didn’t want to go back [to Bayern],” his agent said.

Meanwhile, former Bayern president Uli Hoeness claimed: “We offered him our highest wage and we told him: ‘Take it or leave it’.

“He told me: ‘I’m leaving it’. It surprised me, but I like people like him, people with principles.”

With four league titles and four Champions Leagues between two clubs and a World Cup winners’ medal in his trophy cabinet, Kroos has arguably had one of the most successful careers of the last decade.

Since being named Germany’s national team Player of the Year in 2014, he has made more than 250 appearances for Real Madrid, forming a superb midfield partnership with Croatia international Luka Modric.