WWE Vintage Collection Report: December 26th 2010
By Shaun Best-Rajah.com Reporter
Hosted by: Mean Gene Okerlund
Merry Christmas everyone to a special holiday edition! There are good Santas, bad Santas and festive action from Christmas times past so let’s dive in.
The show opens with Mean Gene dressed as Santa, with the Bushwhackers on his knee. This is from the December 24th 1988 edition of Wrestling Challenge. Okerlund guesses that Luke wants his two front teeth. Luke corrects him saying he wants the Brainbusters. Butch wants the Powers of Pain, before both settle on the Bolsheviks. Butch presents Santa with some New Zealand sardines, but ends up eating them himself. The Bushwhackers then remove Okerlund’s disguise and put on the garb themselves.
One year later we pick things up in the old WWF Studios for the Christmas Eve edition of Prime Time Wrestling. Gorilla Monsoon is in one studio, with co-host Rowdy Roddy Piper in the studio next door. Bobby Heenan had lost a bet and could either pay Piper $25,000 or dress as Santa. He reluctantly chooses the latter and lets out some unenthusiastic ho, ho, ho’s. Piper’s jovial tone changes dramatically when Heenan speculates on there not being a Santa Claus. Piper says he has kids, Christmas is the most wonderful time of year and wants to stay in the spirit. Heenan ignores him and continues saying Santa can’t drink milk as he’ll get it all over his phoney beard. Heenan pulls off the beard and calls Santa a sham. Piper says there is a Santa and he gets gifts from him. Heenan says no-one’s coming to Piper’s neighbourhood after midnight with gifts because he’s a bum. Monsoon urges fans not to listen to Heenan and let him spoil Christmas. Heenan asks when’s the last time you saw a reindeer fly, noting they may draw flies, but they don’t fly. Heenan tells everyone to believe in the Heenan family instead as that’s what the Christmas spirit is all about. An irate Piper moves studios to dress down Heenan, who removes his “fake” hat, glasses, beard and hair and calls Santa an average guy like him walking the streets. Piper goes crazy, clotheslining Heenan over the table and mauling him on the floor. Jeez, I’m sure glad I didn’t see this when I was a kid. That being said, it was a very good segment. Heenan came off as the biggest dick in the world, while Piper was on the money too. Both rank right up there as two of the best talkers in the business.
Bret Hart stands backstage with a more fan friendly Santa after the 1992 Survivor Series (held November 25th). As he muches on a candy cane, Bret tells Santa he wishes for peace and prosperity to everyone around the world. For him personally, Bret wants Santa to bring him the biggest, baddest, meanest, toughest competitors in the entire WWF, just so he can prove to himself and all the sceptics everywhere that he is the best there is, best there was and best there ever will be.
Prime Time Wrestling: October 13th 1992
WWF Title: Bret “Hitman” Hart vs The Berzerker w/Mr Fuji
This is one of Bret’s first title defences after dethroning Ric Flair. Berzerker uses the hair to take Bret down, so Bret opts for the same tactic to push Berzerker over the top rope. Back inside, Berzerker lands a gut shot, followed by a slam and delayed piledriver. Bret rolls out of the way to avoid a kneedrop and goes into his patented comeback of an inverted atomic drop, flying clothesline, side russian legsweep, backbreaker and vertical elbow. Bret twists Berzerker into the Sharpshooter for the inevitable submission. This was basically an exhibition match for Bret, but as solid a match you’re likely to see in a couple of minutes. Winner: BRET “HITMAN” HART.
Monday Night Raw: December 26th 1994
British Bulldog vs Tatanka w/Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase
We join this slightly odd choice of match in progress. Bulldog escapes a chinlock to land a cross body. Tatanka slams, but gets caught coming off the top rope with a gut punch. Bulldog lands a suplex, followed by a couple of clotheslines. DiBiase halts the momentum by pulling down the top rope to send Bulldog to the floor. Lex Luger runs out to check on Bulldog and stalk DiBiase. Luger intercepts a Tatanka sneak attack. Tatanka’s cohort Bam Bam Bigelow comes in, with Luger and Bulldog winning a short four man brawl. Luger and Bulldog would soon form the Allied Powers to go up against DiBiase’s Million Dollar Corporation. Winner: DOUBLE DQ.
We skip ahead to the In Your House PPV held on December 17th 1995. Savio Vega is with Santa Claus, when DiBiase enters the ring to remind us that everyone has a price. As he says this, Santa bashes Savio from behind with his sack then puts the boots to him with DiBiase. Santa gives Savio a slam then DiBiase reminds us even Santa has a price. This leads to…
WWF Superstars: December 23rd 1995
Xanta Klaus vs Scott Taylor
Hailing from the South Pole, the short-lived Xanta gimmick was played by the future Balls Mahoney. Decked in a red top, black pants, gloves, suspender belt, and crew cut, Xanta looked a cross between Mick Foley (in his commissioner days) and Vince Russo. DiBiase says Xanta is a gift to his Million Dollar Corporation. Xanta makes short work of the future Scotty 2 Hotty, using a belly-to-belly suplex and a camel clutch for the submission victory. After the bout, Xanta makes an X across his chest. This was Xanta’s one and only outing as the WWF quickly realised there would be no use in the character once the festive season was over.
Monday Night Raw: December 15th 1997
Santa is in the ring expecting Sable to come out with gifts. A young boy declares he’s not the real Santa and gets kicked out of the ring. Enter Stone Cold Steve Austin. Santa wishes Mr Austin a Merry Xmas, but Austin tells him to shut up. Ho, ho, ho, oh hell yeah! Austin tells Santa off for kicking the kid out. Santa says he was expecting Sable, Austin doesn’t care and wonders if he’s just a fat piece of trash? Austin says if he’s the real Santa, then what did he ask for when he was six? Santa says Austin asked for a Barbie Doll and Tiddlywinks. Austin tells him what he can do with every one of his Tiddlywinks. Austin takes a survey, resolving he’s fat enough to be Santa and has the little rosy cheeks. Austin tells Santa to stand up so he can take a good look at him. Austin asks the kid if it’s the real Santa and he shakes his head. Austin asks the crowd if he’s not the real Santa Claus give me a Hell No! As soon as the crowd agree, Austin offers Santa a present straight from the bottom of Stone Cold’s….heart and gives him a Stone Cold Stunner. Austin drops a forearm from the second rope then tosses the Santa impostor over the top rope.
Monday Night Raw: December 24th 2000
Ahead of a match with the Undertaker, the Rock tells Kevin Kelly he is afraid of no-one then offers to tell his favourite Xmas story, titled “Rocky The People’s Reindeer.” RTPR was very large and very tall, and, unlike Kevin Kelly actually had a set of balls. KK hangs his head in shame. All the other Jabroni reindeer used to be so jealous and look at him in vain because they couldn’t stand the fact that all the people would be chanting Rocky’s name. (Cue Rocky chants). Then one foggy Xmas Eve, Santa was drunk and full of gas, so Rocky took his big bag of toys and shoved them straight up Santa’s candy ass. The comedy continues as Rock sings Undertaker a song. You’d better not laugh, you’d better not cry, you’d better not pout, Rock’s telling you why. Brahma bull is coming to town. Rock warns Undertaker to never forget that his yard will always be on the people’s planet then wishes him a Merry Christmas, if you smell what the Rock is cookin’.
Monday Night Raw : December 22nd 1997
The Rock w/The Nation vs The Undertaker
This is one of the first meetings between the Rock and the Phenom. Rock is the reigning Intercontinental Champion, while Undertaker is being dogged by the recently debuted Kane. D’Lo Brown causes a distraction allowing Rock to attack the Deadman from behind. Undertaker comes back with a boot, clothesline and head rams in several corners. Undertaker floors Rock with a big boot, drops a leg and winds up for old school. Paul Bearer walks out rubbing his hands and the distraction allows Kama to give Undertaker a low blow, which crotches the Deadman along the top rope.
After a commercial break, Rock works over Undertaker’s shoulder with a nerve hold. Undertaker brawls his way back into contention until he runs into an elbow. Undertaker telegraphs a backbodydrop with a legdrop across the back of Rock’s neck. D’Lo gets knocked off the apron before Undertaker ducks a Rock punch and nails a one handed chokeslam. Rock staggers into the Tombstone piledriver, but is saved when the lights go out and Kane’s music plays. Bearer says he’s ashamed he ever had anything to do with Undertaker as he tries to goad him into fighting his “brother.” Undertaker goes to grab Bearer, but Kane attacks him. Undertaker has a chance to fight back, but doesn’t take it as Kane continues to beat him down. Bearer states that Undertaker is nothing now he’s grovelling on his knees and predicts that 1998 will be the year of Kane as the Big Red Machine sets his pyro off.
Okerlund wishes us all a very Vintage holiday season to end the show.
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